Bill Cosby Offered Job At Zoo To Tranquilize Unruly Animals

With all of the trouble that Bill Cosby has been going through over the last year, this might be the light at the end of the tunnel for him.

Zoos across the United States are now under pressure to keep their patrons safe after the tragic situation that unfolded in the Cincinnati zoo last week.

Several of those corporations feel they have the right man for the job, and they are all offering Bill Cosby exuberant amounts of money to accept the position.

“I think we would all feel a little bit safer taking our children to the zoo if we had a man like Cosby in charge of unruly animals,” said Tracy Whipple, a regular at the San Diego Zoo. “I think he has the most experience and would do a fine job.”

The zookeepers say they would provide Cosby the tranquilizers and would not allow him to bring his own.

“No one needs to worry about the animals at our zoo. We would not allow Cosby to bring his own tranquilizers. We will provide him the best, top-quality tranquilizers to use. But don’t be fooled, we will be keeping an eye on the animals after they are tranquilized. I’m not sure we are comfortable leaving them alone with Cosby while they are unconscious. But that’s something we will have to work out through negotiations.”

Cosby has not responded to the job offers as of yet. 25 zoos across the country are anxiously awaiting his response.